This Marble Race Is More Exciting Than the Entire F1 Season

Not like that was so hard.

YouTube

Call it the Two Dollar Grand Prix. Of all the rabbit holes to wander down on Facebook at 3 a.m., this video was the rare standout among Russian dashcam crashes and extreme dyno pulls.

As one of nearly 62 million people to view this marble racing video, I came away questioning why it was so enjoyable. No cars, no drivers, no rules, and no hype. All the standard hooks are missing.

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To my insomnia-driven eyes, it didn’t matter. Not one bit.

Transfixed by 33 marbles—the same number of starters in the Indy 500—using gravity to race down an endlessly long squiggle-course stamped into a muddy hillside, I found myself rooting for one contender more than the others. Why? No clue, but that’s what we do.

And it was awesome, and there were surprises, not to mention a few forks in the road that forced changes at the head of the pack. Only as the video drew to a conclusion did I finally figure out the marble race comes with narration; the tiny glass spheres even have names—akin to a horse race. I preferred the silent version .

A dozen rungs below slot car and RC racing, we have the no-tech sporting enjoyment of marbles. I just might need to invest in one and start my own team. What kind of prize money does it pay?

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